Kroger Sparkling Water – Blue Raspberry Pop

This is a new one, maybe a “limited edition”—which always gets me—I’ll empty my bank account for anything that’s called limited edition! It tastes good, like raspberry, of course, a little bit artificial, but then, the confections with the flavor “blue raspberry” (soft drinks, slurpos, flav-R-ices) all taste a little artificial, which is part of their charm, so in that respect they nailed it. Once again, I wondered if we’d see a bold approach… and color this one blue (which would mean, I guess, artificial color) —but no. It’s clear. Both a disappointment and a relief. It’s funny how the font that says “Sparkling Water” is bigger than anything else on the can, as if they were afraid they’d confuse people, otherwise. For once thing, “pop” means soft drink in certain regions, like Ohio, where this water is from. But in this case, I think they’re referring to the Bomb Pop—which is an actual product—by using the generic “Blue Raspberry Pop.” Or else, maybe this is an exercise in DADA. The can is light blue, and there’s a small, single, red raspberry floating in front of a red, white, and blue “Bomb Pop”—to further complicate things. So, what does this all mean? The traditional Bomb Pop was flavored cherry, lime, and blue raspberry, so this kind of makes sense. I used to love those things, despite them being shaped like an instrument of death. I looked ’em up, to see if they still exist—they do! Though I’m a little disappointed to see they’re now offered in 250 X-treme flavors, including Napalm, Nuclear Fallout, and General Jack Ripper’s Jism.

No. 160 – 10.10.26