Eileen

Eileen by Ottessa Moshfegh (2015) I heard somewhere that this book was made into a movie already, so I decided I should read it first, because after you see a movie, you don’t want to read a book that it was based on because it feels too much like homework—the comparisons weighing on you. I heard an interview with the author, Ottessa Moshfegh, and I felt like I related to her in some way or another, which is one of those things that gets me reading a book. The story is narrated by a much older Eileen—so right off, we’re not worrying too much if she’s going to die before this immediate saga is through—which is always a relief. It takes place, oddly, in 1964, I believe—which is probably about the first year I remembered things—though it was mostly Vietnam stuff on TV—the oppressive nightly news. I couldn’t help comparing my own “ideal” childhood to Eileen’s exceedingly grim one (she says something like she despises people with ideal childhoods—ha). She is 24, so born in 1940 (which I used to think of as a cutoff year—anyone born later than that was “young”) which makes Eileen about four years younger than my mom—and she is the age my mom was when I was born—weird. Also, 1964 was the year my aunt was murdered, while living with us—which as a kid, I didn’t know about until much later—but still, I knew something was up. For some reason my aunt was gone and my parents were acting insane. She refers to the town as “X-ville” for some reason (I guess so we don’t go looking it up on the map—most people don’t do that—I do). Which is fine, and also compelled me to just translate it to my hometown, which isn’t New England, but is still spooky Northern Ohio on the lake—probably more ghost Puritans and witches in her town, but plenty of ghost Native Americans and religious fanatics in mine. Either way, we both had prisons, crappy bars, and people in hiding. Also, there’s a character named Randy—what’s a name mean? Well, it’s hard for me to get away from that one. He’s the major obsession for Eileen until Rebecca comes along (named supposedly after the movie, Rebecca). Even without these insights and incidental personal connections, I would have found this an engaging and haunting book. You are getting to know Eileen little by little, often painfully (I wouldn’t let a best friend be this open about stuff—but I guess that’s why we have books—and for a while, you’re thinking, this is why we have poltergeists). The story then takes a hard turn toward brightness and fun when she meets this mysterious character, Rebecca—who I was initially frightened of, but then came to love as quickly as Eileen became infatuated with her. For one thing, you know some weird shit is gonna come to light eventually. But first, the book took a really grim turn toward reality—which you could see coming, or should have, as this is a prison for kids. The whole story still kept on being hilariously funny, somehow, in its way—even while we’re face to face with some really sad and depressing realties of abuse. And at this point, I can’t really say more without messing it up for the reader who might have not read it… plus, I’ve said enough.

6.8.23