Archie Bleyer “Hernando’s Hideaway” / “S’il Vous Plait”

I’m pretty sure this 1954 Cadence maroon label 45 is one from my parents’ collection that I misappropriated, not that they cared, and somehow retained though my 758 moves over the years—and it’s not even important to me—it’s a thrift-store staple, I imagine—sold alotta units, has a novelty aspect. Still, it’s an okay record, from bandleader Archie Bleyer. “Hernando’s Hideaway” is with Maria Alba, Castanet Soloist! A really catchy, atmospheric tango, and there’s a chorus—dude, or dudes, sounding full fraternity. The lyrics and setup were irresistible to me, when I was a kid—“I know a dark, secluded place,” and, “You’ll meet your Uncle Max,” and… where’s The Golden Fingerbowl?! What a name! And knock three times and say you were sent by Joe, etc. I think that my juvenile mind went right to the sexual implications, especially, “You’ll be free to gaze at me,”—I’m (young me) totally thinking, he’s exposing himself! “S’il Vous Plait” sounds French, I thought, as a lad, leave me alone! Why didn’t we have mandatory French in grade school? I would have known that it meant: “Let me touch your breasts.” Instead, I probably ignored this romantic B-side vocal (most in in English, same dudes) with a trumpet solo by James Burke—too bad, too, because it could have been a great make-out platter, and at under three minutes, no one’s going to get in trouble.

9.18.26