“Time Out of Mind”—second song, side two of Gaucho (1980)

The phrase “time out of mind” has always bored me, though once I considered it more closely, it confused me, which I guess is better. A time before people remember—does such a thing exist? Unless you’re talking about history in general, which we do seem doomed to repeat. It’s also the name of that Bob Dylan record from 1997—not sure what he had in (or out of) mind. That’s an odd one for me because I loved it when it came out, but now I can barely listen to it. Who knows why you turn on a record like that. As far as this record, Gaucho, goes, I’m still in the long process of coming around to it—and in that arduous journey, this song is one of the last to fall. My longtime one-word review would have been: “insipid.” Of course, those diehard “Dan” fans are more likely to say: “sublime”—and I’ve got to respect their opinions—after all, we share the love of our favorite band! Is there something wrong with me? (Please don’t answer that.) Is there something I’m not hearing? I’ve got to listen harder. (Or, maybe, less hard?)

Still… no. If this was a movie, it would be the montage scene where a fresh-faced, blond, yuppie couple spends Sunday afternoon laughing at the antics of ducklings, riding rented bicycles, and eating frozen yogurt. Could it be ironic? To try to understand, I must turn to the lyrics. (The ones other than the chorus, “Time out of miiiiiind…”) Which is something I was going to do anyway. It’s absolute gibberish. Short of possibly being anther song about masturbation, I have no idea—so I have to resort to the internet, where there are people much more versed in drug slang and references than I am. And the consensus seems to be a compelling argument for this being an unambiguous love letter to “smoking heroin.” In movies, I’ve watched way too many “shocking” scenes of junkies shooting up, which was always supposed to have been one level more shocking than seeing someone shot with a bullet. But smoking heroin, no (though I do recall some opium smoking). Anyway, knowing that that’s what “Tonight when I chase the dragon” refers to, I suppose it all falls into place—including the title—as it seems to be the particular charm of opioid drugs to allow you to forget time just previous to the mess you would find yourself in (if you could remember how you got there).

It’s impossible to consider any song on this record without considering it being a “breakup record”—that is, the band breaking up, or more specifically, the partnership of Donald Fagen and Walter Becker (who were approximately 32 and 30 when it came out—kids! But feeling as old as the hills). I’m to understand that they wrote together—but who primarily came up with lyrics, I have no idea, but maybe that’s not important. Whether just one of them or both were enjoying/struggling with heroin around this time, is also not important in understanding the song. Plus, they both had life experiences to draw from, not to mention those of acquaintances, not to mention they both watched movies and read books. Is there irony in writing a happy-go-lucky, breezy tune about smoking heroin? Maybe, or maybe it’s just a sunny snapshot of what must be a relatively awesome drug experience. (Why else would one endure the expense, danger, stigma, etc.?) And can “chasing the dragon” still operate metaphorically beyond its initial metaphor? That is, could it also be referring, in this song, to something as equally as wonderful feeling and potentially destructive and dangerous? Desperately trying to replicate the highs of something such as success, love, or a creative partnership operating at the highest levels of creativity and inspiration? Of course it could.

—Randy Russell 7.16.23