Pink Moon

NO DOUBT influenced by the today’s Pink Moon, my magic ticker happened to fall on the legendary Scottsdale, Arizona landmark, the Pink Pony, which originally opened in 1947, then moved to its present location in 1970—well it’s closed for good now, I guess. A lot of info on its re-opening, re-closing, again, etc., kind of hard to tell—I’ve got a dozen tabs open—it feels like unstable, unreliable time travel. Sounds like when the place first opened it was the only thing in Scottsdale besides desert—dirt roads, etc.—it was quite a hike to Phoenix—until they both swelled like wine stains on a linen tablecloth and became one and the same. (Glendale, too—do all the Glendales ever get together?) The most recent Pink Pony location looks really cool—and ready for a new tenant. Since I just got the notification, here, that my rent is going up (rather bad timing), I’m looking for a place to move, so why not Scottsdale? (Scott is my middle name, after all.) I could rent the old Pink Pony location and open a throwback bar, serve only pink cocktails, and sleep in the back. But then, out of curiosity, I looked up the weather—96 degrees! (Saturday at 6pm). In April? How is it that everyone moved to this town? I know people really love hot weather, but do people love AC nine months of the year? I do not. So, what next. I noticed that the newfangled coffee shop in the former Dentice Sausage closed (corner of Jackson and Pleasant, in Milwaukee)—so, keeping it here in town where the weather is sane—I’ll check the rent there, and maybe troll for investors. Maybe it’s time for me to put on the Big Boy Pants, figure out on which side to butter my bread, and learn to make the sausages—literally—meaning not literally. Maybe a Big Boy franchise would work, with a Friday Fish Fry, coupled with a sewing and crafts store, coffee shop, and art gallery!

Failing that, my new novel, Around Desire, will soon be out, official release date is the Strawberry Full Moon 2025 (11 June), and if everyone reading this pre-ordered it, and forwarded this post to 10 people who then forwarded to 10 people, and so forth, well, no curse will fall on any of you! Or… you can buy the eBook NOW (follow that link) for $3.99—the price of half a cup of coffee. Well, my coffee cup is half full because I’m confident readers will embrace the sheer excitement and disturbing situations portrayed within its pages. I have no illusions that it’s the best book ever written, but I’m predicting that future critics will place it approximately between “Mockingbird” and “Gatsby,” with a little coaxing. My false modesty has not served me in the past, so it’s time for a new approach.

I find that whenever I finish a big project (say, several years of work) and it’s finally done (let’s say, a novel), when I finally hold it in my hands in its physical form (or, even, e-version) the whole thing then just turns to dust. It crumbles, reduces to dust, the breeze picks up, and it’s gone. There is nothing. I’ve experienced this depressing state in the past, so it’s no big news to me, but still, it’s hard to take. Nothing in the world helps, either, except for working on something new. So much for retirement.

Speaking of which, no possible retirement from wages, as well—in fact, I’m just thankful that that’s even still an option. As dire as things look, lately, last week I strongly considered falling back on drinking and the attendant looming demise. I could become a “rummy,” I thought (still gluten-free)—do people still use that term? It seems charmingly dated, if not quite charming. I mean, possibly more grim than even the sweet wine. My brand would be, like, Cap’n Ron’s Leakin’ Lifeboat 621 Overproof. Which brings us to a sparkling water review, from the archives.

Waterloo – Pineapple

Water Review No. 5 – 9.6.22

The only thing I like better than pineapple is nothing. The fruit, the image, the symbol—pineapple is weird and complex and fun. To be honest, there are a few things I like better: books, pumpkins, and cats. But that’s about it. The problem is, since I quit eating sugar, most sweet things taste ten times as sweet—too sweet, and no longer edible. So, I can’t really eat pineapple, or drink pineapple juice. The piña colada was once my favorite cocktail—back when I ate sugar (and, of course, drank rum). But that’s a seriously sweet cocktail, especially if you use cream of coconut, which is really sweet. The only part of that cocktail that’s not sweet is the ice—and if you use 151 proof rum, that cuts it down a little. So, anyway, this Waterloo Pineapple Sparkling Water tastes exactly like pineapple—no complaints there. It’s a good one. Then it occurred to me how good this would be with rum—like a really dry white rum of impeccable quality. Or, how about this. Mix part this water, part coconut flavored sparking water (I know it’s out there), and rum—and now you have a not-too-sweet piña colada! Then it occurred to me—I’d better watch out—this sparking water business could very well be a slippery slope.

—Randy Russell 4.13.25