Tuesday, December 13, 1977

Once Uncle Oompah was at a cocktail party thrown by his rich aunt for all his relatives. Everyone was dressed up, but U.O. just had on overalls and his Budweiser T-shirt (not because U.O. always dresses like a slob, but it was just what he happened to be wearing when his aunt sent him a rather inconsiderate, last minute invitation). While everyone else at the party was served exotic cocktails, U.O. was handed a can of beer with no glass (it was low Blatz at that). After putting down 12 or so of these, U.O. had to urinate, and so he looked around for the bathroom. He asked the butler who replied, “The powder room is over there.” The impatient U.O. replied, “I don't give a fuck about no goddamn powder room, show me where the shitter is.” And at that he got up and took a piss in the fountain in the middle of the living room.