Sunday, December 11, 1977

Uncle Oompah, in his younger craaazy-er days was a philosophy prof at Harvard. He made fake credentials to get the job because he didn't know a damn thing about philosophy. Every day in his classes, they would just talk about TV shows and X-rated movies, and he gave everyone A's so they didn't complain. All the girls went crazy over Uncle Oompah, the handsome devil he was at the time, and he kept some of them after class for a little extra extracurricular activity. But once the dean caught Uncle Oompah with a girl in the nurse's room (with the nurse tied up and gagged in the corner). Uncle Oompah was playing gynecologist and he got fired the next day.