Thursday, September 29, 1977

I hate it when monkeys get in our trash cans. This gets me very upset. They jump around and make a big mess, spilling garbage all over the driveway. Many mornings I am awakened at 3 or four o'clock to the sound of “oooh, ooooh, ooh, ooooh, ooooh.” I think the only solution to the problem would be to lay out and wait for the monkeys to come in the morning. Then aim my .458 magnum rifle at them and squeeze the trigger. If mom would only give me my bullets back this would work. Or maybe I could buy some monkey traps at Hills.